Moving to university is a massive milestone. As September approaches, your social media is probably flooded with posts about Freshers’ Week (aka Welcome Week at York). It is often portrayed as the best week of your life, with nonstop going out and meeting your lifelong friends. Whilst this may be the case for some, for a neurodivergent student, that packed social schedule can feel incredibly daunting. As someone with ADHD, I have firsthand experience in feeling overwhelmed about Freshers’ Week. I will share in this blog how I managed to have an amazing time without overstepping my own boundaries, and how you can do the same!
The reality of Freshers’ Week
For neurodivergent students, the transition to university often means dealing with lots of new things all at once, for example, a new living space, a new learning style, new people, and so much more. For me, simple neurotypical tasks, such as busy nights out, noisy freshers’ fairs, and endless small talk, could’ve easily led to burnout. In my experience, pushing yourself to a point of overwhelm to keep up with everyone else is never the move. The absolute best thing you can do is take a minute for yourself, reset, and then go again. Everyone’s Freshers’ Week is different and the most important thing is that you are enjoying it as much as possible. This might mean not attending every single event or night out.
A night in
During my Freshers’ Week, about halfway through a 7-day planned clubbing stint, my brain simply hit its limit and I knew I needed a break. Instead of forcing myself out and ruining the rest of my week, I decided to make the most of a brand-new, exciting room and spend the night in, watching a film. It was definitely the best choice for me. That mental reset gave me exactly the relaxation and recharge I needed to thrive for the rest of the week’s activities. The best part is, it turned out one of my new flatmates was feeling exactly the same way. We ended up staying in together, and the start of a great friendship commenced through this shared experience.
So all of this is to say, whether it means missing one night, heading home early, or turning up an hour late, listen to what your body/brain is telling you it needs. 9 times out of 10, it knows best. Also, your college will often plan alternative activities, such as, crafts, games nights, or a variety of other things, so make sure to check your itinerary for these.
Use the support available
On that note, if you feel comfortable to do so, I highly recommend speaking to your flatmates and other new university friends about how you’re feeling. It can seem as if everyone else is effortlessly gliding through the week, but more often than not, other people are also finding the transition overwhelming. Ultimately you’re all going through the same experience. Opening up helped me meet others who were feeling exactly the same way. These support systems I built early on have carried me through my entire university journey! Outside of your flatmates and friends, there is amazing support available at York:
- STYCs and STYMs (Second and Third Year Contacts/Mentors) are older students who have recently lived the exact same experiences and guide you through Freshers’ Week/first year. They are great to talk to as they often relate to what you’re going through or can point you in the direction of someone who does.
- College Managers and Staff are based in the central building of your college and are professionals dedicated to your welfare and a positive student life. Whatever you are going through they have probably heard it before and again are a great first point of support.
- The Open Door Team are the University’s dedicated mental health support team and can work with you throughout your three years at university on whatever you choose to share with them.
Forget the FOMO
Before starting at uni, my perception was that you had to drag yourself to every event in Freshers’ Week because it was the only opportunity to make friends. I can say that this could not be further from the truth! Three years at university is a long stretch, and you might not meet your forever friends in the first week. For me, my friendship groups have naturally evolved by joining societies, meeting people on my course, picking up college sport, and some random meetings, for example, a random Wednesday night out. The bottom line is, this is your university journey, so be kind to yourself. Take it at your own pace, and make sure to enjoy yourself first and foremost!
Thanks for reading 🙂
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